Political Parties To Have Quotas For Women MPs

Apparently, it seems the UK’s political parties feel that the rest of the British population would despise politicians far less if there were more women amongst their ranks, despite the experience of the last few years of increased numbers of female MPs.
So, despite evidence that most women would much rather chew their own heads off, or – if the worst came to the worst – endure a full-on threesome with Gordon Brown and Jack straw, than even consider entering the mind-numbing, soul-destroying slough of despond that is modern political life, the political parties are seemingly determined to have more female, and other ‘minority’ MPs in an attempt to make their publicity photographs appeal to as wide a demographic as possible. All this despite the fact that the overwhelming majority of voters have no interest in the sex, ethnicity or any other diversity tick-box of their elected representatives, being only really interested in whether the candidate has some competence for the job… for a change.
As one voter said:

The trouble is that politics attracts the kind of people who are interested in politics, with an almost pathological need to stick their noses into things they have very little understanding of, when what the country needs to elect are people who have a deep fascination with whether our bins get emptied on time, or realise that criminals are not just an excitingly exotic subculture, or that the ethnic diversity of the BBC’s weathermen makes no difference to the amount of snow that falls on us.

However, some current MPs have expressed concerns that an increase in the number of women MPs could bring about changes to the traditions of the Houses of Parliament. Consequently, a senior political party figure moved to reassure the current batch of parliamentarians, saying:

There is absolutely no reason why women can’t be as inept, venal, incompetent, or corrupt, as men, as the present Labour government has so overwhelmingly demonstrated.

Unfortunately, though, it seems as though the plans of the political parties will come to naught as women, it seems would much rather do a job that matters than strut and posture on the political stage for at best a few moments of glory, but mostly to see all that they once believed about the world and how it works crushed under the careering juggernaut of reality. As a veteran BBC political commentator said:

Frankly, most women – like most men - have more sense than to waste their time in the petty bickering and backstabbing of political parties when they can get plenty of that at any family get-together. So, in order to meet their quotas the political parties will have to have pressgangs hiding near shoe shops and cake shops ready to pounce on any unsuspecting women who even vaguely represents that party’s demographic. It is the only way they’ll get sufficient numbers to meet these ludicrous targets they’ve set themselves.