Unluckily, though, she was not stopped by the police pursuit vehicle before taking the sharp right into the West Midlands Safari Park and ran the risk of roller skating naked into the lion enclosure. An act which is – curiously – omitted from the park’s warning signs, which will soon surely be rectified, at least when the park attendants have finished their in-depth study of the CCTV footage of the incident where she ended up startling several penguins before managing to stop herself by grabbing hold of a stanchion.
Still, she was the one who suggested that our love-life needed a bit of a fillip (or – now I come to think of it, did she mean that Philip from three doors down who is always out in his garden - stripped to the waist - chopping logs). Now, though, I suspect that the roller skates will soon be returned to their box and be put on top of the wardrobe alongside all her previous good ideas that failed the test of time and circumstances. All of which I should never again mention, or even allude to, again, if I want to make sure that, next time, it is not me who is caught by the constables as I roller-skate naked down some local dual carriageway.
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