ASA Criticises Government Ads

Some government press ads, meant to scare the UK population shitless over the possible dangers of climate change, have been banned by the Advertising Standards Authority, for being - as the ASA press release stated:

A complete load of bollocks.

The ads which featured scores of people running around, like headless chickens being chased by chainsaw-wielding psycho-foxes, all screaming: ‘We’re all going to die and its all YOUR fault, you heartless selfish bastard!’ at the viewer, have been running for 3 minutes at a time during every single ad-break at peak viewing time, causing several hundred people with nothing better to do, and – apparently, no mute button or off-switch - to complain about them to the ASA.

[Ed ‘cracking cheese Gromit’ Millimetre]

In response, climate change secretary Ed ‘cracking cheese Gromit’ Millimetre responded by dismissing the agency’s attack on the ads:

We are the holy and the righteous, anything we may slightly exaggerate, or even totally make-up and lie about, is only ever done for that most noble of reasons – keeping this – the people’s - government in power. Furthermore, we are – as a government - committed to pissing tax-payer’s money up the wall on ads for things that those who care about the subject will already know all about anyway, while those that don’t give a toss about it will still continue not give a toss about, no matter what we do. As a government we strongly believe that tax-payer’s money is our money to spend on whatever we want to spend it on, even if it is a load of bollocks. So piss off and leave us alone before I introduce a bill to make you illegal.

However, as an environmental journalist said:

Of course, to the government whether there is such a thing as so-called ’climate change’, or not is irrelevant. What matters to them is the opportunities it gives them to exert more social control over the populace, and as a way to increase their tax take in order to pay for that increased social control. Not only that, it does produce situations that all governments love, a chance to divert attention away from the government and towards something else seemingly more catastrophically scary. This is especially useful when the government –as usual – has cocked something up and needs to divert attention away from itself for a while.