A Funny Thing

"Now, here's a funny thing," I said.

"I can see that," she replied, smiling.

I sighed. "No, not that," I said with some irritation as I refastened my trouser zip. "This."

"What?"

I moved closer and opened my hand slowly and carefully.

"Aaah," she cooed, reaching out to stroke it, but - for once - my zip remained fastened. Instead, she peered at the thing in my hand. "It's very small."

"I know," I snapped. "But I am doing all the exercises with the device. Anyway, I measured it last night, and it…."

"No," she reached out a finger to stroke the contents of my hand. "This," she whispered. "It is rather small."

"Careful. It is quite delicate."

"It feels as soft as the fur on my pussy," she said in wonder.

"But I thought you said you'd shaved it all off?"

She looked up at me, her brow furrowed in puzzlement. "What?"

I glanced down at her crotch, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh. No, not that. My pussy… Sam."

It was my turn to do the puzzled look.

"Sam, my pu… my cat, remember?"

"Oh, yes. Of course," I lied.

"It is soft though."

"Well." I squirmed. "I've not been well, recently, and… well… I have had a couple of drinks, and…."

She glanced up at me, finding it difficult to tear her eyes away from my open palm. "No, I didn't mean that. I mean this." She stroked the thing resting on my open palm again.

"Oh!" she cried, suddenly. "There are two of them."

"No." I smiled. "Look closer."

"Oh, it looks like two, at first, but there's really only one of them… er… it."

The small furry creature sitting in the palm of my hand lifted both of its heads and looked at her, blinking slowly.

"What are they… er… what is it?" she asked in wonder. "Tell me."

"I thought you knew," I said.

"No."

"It's a Double Entendre, of course," I said.