One Of Those Lives

So what then?

I did not want to be here, doing this. I wanted one of those lives that made some kind of difference. Not in a big way though, I didn’t want to be one of those people we blame for changing the world, one of those who takes it upon themselves to grab hold of history and twist it out of shape, taking the lives of so many people and scattering them on the winds. I didn’t even want to be one of those who oppose the tyrants of history, one of those souls,- sometimes named, sometimes nameless – who take a stand and go down fighting to the last tattered shred of their honour and humanity.

I most certainly didn’t want to be one of those empty-headed, empty-lived, celebrities that fill up the tabloid world with their egocentric existences, living out on the far edge of the consumer dream. To be some entity for brand-names to hang themselves off in their fevered screaming for the fickle attention of those that think that the brand is some kind of fairy godmother that will make all their dreams of being noticed, not for what they are, but for what they pretend to be, come true.

No, I wanted to be one of those quiet ones who stand on the edge. The one you see walking along the early morning beach, or sitting on the park bench, not forlorn, but at ease with the universe. One of those who knows how to set small worlds going and how to populate them with people that seem more real than this shadowland we walk through like lost and forgotten ghosts. I wanted to be one of those who looked at you with eyes that knew, and when you asked answered ‘yes.’