Other Uses for a Parachute

Still, it was not as if we’d made any real use of the parachute, so even if it was second-hand (or, rather, previously-owned) there was not much danger of it failing through over-use.

However, as with all such things you don’t tend to want to use them until strictly necessary, unless your idea of fun is falling out of aeroplanes.

Anyway, that wasn’t the reason why we’d wanted the parachute, as those of you who have read past chapter 86 in the Big Boy’s Book of Advanced Sexual Perversions, or – purely in the interests of research - glanced at the accompanying illustrations (especially fig. 234b).

Although, I suppose if you were attempting to perform the exercises from the aforesaid chapter on the upper part of a bunk-bed, then I suppose there would be times where a parachute could be used for its intended purpose.

Anyway, it all became a bit moot when she accidentally turned over two pages at once and utilised the pineapple without slicing it into rings first. So, for the next few months - at least, according to my doctor – I should avoid attempting to climb into the top bunk at all… even with a parachute.

So, all-in-all we decided – in the end – it would be best if we could see if we could sell the parachute and, at least, get some money back that we could – perhaps – us to buy an automatic pineapple slicer.

It would – we both agree – be for the best.