Scientists Warn Of Biodiversity Threat

It was revealed today that some scientists are increasingly concerned by the threat to biodiversity caused by certain species dying out.

As one political scientist said yesterday:

With their increasingly plummeting poll ratings, it seems that the traditional Labour voter could soon be entirely extinct in the UK.

Some political scientists cite the loss of the habitat of the traditional Labour voter, the metropolitan polytechnic social science department, as the main cause of the decline. They point out that the Left as a political philosophy has been in a long slow decline more or less throughout its history, as its inherent internal contradictions become more and more apparent as they are tested against reality.

The political scientists point out that despite occasional flurries, and occasional apparent increases in numbers, it seems inevitable that the Labour voter is headed for extinction, and very, very soon.

Faced with the inexorable decline in its numbers, the Labour government set up protected reservations for Labour voters as workers in the public sector, but typical Labour over-grazing of the public purse means that there will – after the election – be a famine in public sector jobs, and even – it seems - some areas where severe culling seems inevitable.

In former times the traditional middle-class Lefty who was the core of the Labour vote used to survive by living off the working class, mainly by patronizing them and promising the herds of workers that the Left would lead them into a valley of milk and honey. Instead, though, the Left led them up an ideological dead end where the hopes and aspirations of the beguiled working class were cruelly slaughtered in frantic attempts at a hodgepodge of misguided social engineering aimed at increasing the numbers in its client base in order to feed the voracious Labour party’s election-winning appetite. Ironically, though, and seemingly much to the bewilderment of those in the Labour party itself, this has led to a massive decrease in the number of people willing to become Labour Voters.

Consequently, in recent years the Labour party has had to resort to increasingly authoritarian methods in order to keep its ever-dwindling herd of voters cowed and docile enough to vote for the party. But it seems now that even the most fervent and committed Labour voters are quite simply losing the will to live, and – it seems – will soon be extinct.

However, most scientists seem to think that this will not be a total environmental disaster. As one political scientist said, after forcing himself to sit through a TV interview with Gordon Brown:

Quite frankly the Left is a total evolutionary dead end. Everything they do makes things worse instead of better –as they’d hoped. They just don’t seem capable of learning that the world does not work in the way they think it does. To be honest, he sooner they all die out the better for all of us.