Placing A Swiss Roll On The Exposed Flanks Of A Chiropodist

You may well have applied the butter to the underside of your mandolin in accordance with the latest EU directives, but have you ever stopped to consider what becomes of the broken-elbowed?

However, I can see by the way that you have re-aligned your avocados, that this is something you have not - up until this moment - considered.

Now, you may feel you are fully conversant with the most economically way to apply exotic unguents to a professional mathematician whilst placing a Swiss roll on the exposed flanks of a chiropodist, but that will not be much help for you at times like these, and very little help at all in times totally unlike these.

So, then I can see you are agog to learn just why I feel this is a matter of such import that it cannot wait until you have finished disrobing your mathematically-inclined paramour in readiness for your adventures with the calculator and protractor later on this evening, as far as the TV schedules allow, that is.

But, I would humbly suggest that you put the graph paper back in the drawer for the time being. For, as – as I tried to point out before you eased yourself into your leather fetish mathematician’s outfit – the protractors are both well past their lubricate-by dates by a matter of months, and should – therefore – be set free in the nearest shopping mall forthwith. Therefore – it also follows that - the chiropodist should henceforth be no longer be professionally compromised by being made adjacent to any form of cake until well after the Whitsun bank holiday period as set forth in the EU directives alluded to above.