The Trouble with Taxation

 

Of course, at first, not that many people had one… at least not that they’d admit to. After all, if you had one, would you mention it… especially to anyone in an official capacity charged with taking an interest in such matters, particularly in relation to revenue-raising?

I thought not.

After all, as soon as someone in authority thought about it, they made it illegal to have one without paying any tax on it, which is what those in authority like to do. After all, they assume, what is the point of being in authority if you do not use that authority to seriously piss other people off?

So, after the first ones arrived from wherever in the universe they came from, or – as some have speculated – from some other dimension not too unlike this one, but with more fluffy things, everybody wanted one, even if just to feel that fur purring peacefully on the bed next to them.

Luckily, or so we thought at the time, these creatures (if they are creatures) are very keen on breeding, almost as much as people are, or at least they are as keen on doing it as humans are….

Yes, they do – before you ask - and they like it, even with people you or I would run away from. Fumblies will mate with everyone and everything… including – for some reason – old car tyres.

So, everybody was having a good time – including the Fumblies (and – quite possibly – the old car tyres) and so those in authority realised that this would never do, so they decide to tax the ownership of Fumblies, and – when that didn’t put a stop to it – they thought about making owning one illegal. However the authorities soon discovered that there is a point beyond which even the authorities cannot piss people off, at least not if they want to keep their cushy jobs.

However, now the Fumblies have applied – through some very high-powered intergalactic lawyers, to have all the taxes on them revoked as contrary to, and in clear breach of, their (non-)human rights as set out in the Sentient Beings (Non-taxable status thereof) Act of Star Date: -322905.53873203794. Because, if there is one thing Fumblies like even better than eating doughnuts and having sex with all and sundry (and old car tyres) that thing is pissing off those in authority, often just for the hell of it.