She came out of the mists of morning, roller-skating naked into our lives with all the… er… with all the… well, like some woman with no clothes on roller-skating… in the mist. You have to admit that folk wisdom is a bit short on similes for such occurrences, not only because most of those aphorisms and sayings seem to date from some distant agrarian past, or to be a load of cock about misfiring muskets, dodgy seafaring mishaps and so forth, they all seem to predate roller-skates… and casual nudity.
However, I suppose I could have come up with some sort of comparison to Lady Godiva, but it is a bit late for that now we are past the moment. Anyway, roller-skates and nudity would probably – in those days of yore – be regarded as akin to witchcraft or something like that. One minute she’d be feeling the air rushing past, ruffling her bush, next thing you know she’s tied to a stake in the village square and starting to smoulder.
Not a great start to the morning by anyone’s standards.
Well, when I say naked – she had socks on… under the skating boot things… as someone who has never roller-skated – even as a child - my knowledge of such accoutrements is limited. As it happens, I wasn’t paying that much attention to the skates… or the socks… or the mist… at the time.
Anyway, before I could even formulate some sort of suitable greeting for such a meeting so early on a misty morning, she was gone… off into the mist almost as if I’d imagined the whole thing… except for the bruise on my cheek where I’d walked into the lamppost as she sped past.
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