Last night it emerged that one of the finalists in the latest series of Britain’s Got Politics – the self-styled Golden Gordon Economic Juggler Extraordinaire And Saviour Of The Universe – had been checked into The Priory, the clinic for ‘over-tired’ celebrities, said to be suffering from delusions of adequacy.
In recent weeks, Golden Gordon, the one-time favourite of some of the audience for his claims to have restored seriousness to Britain’s Got Politics, seems to have fallen off the rails. His economic sleight of hand was seen by some political commentators as a welcome change of pace after the comedic turn, Tony ‘Del-Boy’ Blair, had won all the last three series of the programme with his famous skits on ‘Weapons Of Mass Destruction’, ‘Being A Straight Kinda Guy’, ‘Roll Up, Roll Up, Get Your Peerages Here!’ and many, many more.
However, it seems that Golden Gordon can no longer keep any of his balls in the air, with even his glamorous assistant, ‘Mandy’ Mandelson – former drama queen of the EU - seemingly beginning to despair of him too.
Consequently, Gordon’s audience ratings have plummeted and it now seems inevitable that he will lose most – if not all – of the audience vote when the final comes around sometime in the next year. Most Britain’s Got Politics pundits confidently expect the eventual winner will most likely be Dancing Dave, the former PR man turned song and dance act, who has been wowing audiences with his ‘all your old favourites with a brand new soft-shoe shuffle!’ routine.
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